Erasing Him……Vent P3

Baby where you at -  Joe ft Papoose
This is what I have decided to play
Why?
It makes me wonder hard where is he
I wonder if he is a live
Is he dead
Did someone from his past come to collect his soul
Or did a woman some to replenish his heart
All these question I wonder hard
I want to know nothing else but his well being
I don’t know anything other than this
I pray so hard but I feel they are falling on deaf ears
So I go thru my phone erasing everything that has to do with him
We only have memories that one day will fade
I said I would say I love on the phone
I express myself only in per4son
I wanted him to understand my fully
I wanted to tell him I’m sorry daily
Why I had the opportunity to please
The reason on why he is for me
My regrets on knowing him has not set in
I wanted to play a role so much for him
I wanted to play a spot that he placed for me
 But now it seems he has left me no words spoken
Nothing left to say
I can only fight what’s in front me
I can only do what is needed to make me happy
which come to find out was him
Like a drug addict he was my fix
But now I much go to AA
I must recover from this addiction
I took everything that meant so much to me
I took everything reminded me of him and cast it out
How can you leave me with not a single word
Prove me wrong that the way I’m feeling is nonsense
Be a man and tell me that I no longer the reason you love
Tell me that the friend we were build was for nothing
Curse and say that I am not the one for you
All I ask is that you tell me
Let the voice that brought me so much comfort be my demise
Let the sounds of  your rhymes be my final ending
At least you owe me that
But now I can even get that
This is the reason why its so hard for me to breathe
But now I know what I must do
I must ease you as if you never existed
Take what I have left and cherish it
I must continue with my life
But I will keep in mind when I come thru
But by then you know me
And by then I wont know the new you
I wanted……I want nothing any more
So now I can stop the tears from  flowing
I can wash my pillow of the salty aftermath
Cater back to the way I use to be
Breathing
Exhale…….