Accountability

You gave me ownership of something I never wanted

You gave me reasons that I never took account for

You said so much that my words seem not to matter

And now that the end for you is near

I have to be accountable

So……. but why do I need to have your heart

When days I give you mine you say I want to give first

Like the actions of first and last is sacred

Who made these rules?

Who said that moon and star were you’re to give

Who said the sun and had to revolve around me if that is my wish

Guess what it is not

I gave no indication that all of these things had to be given

So I make small options to adjust for you

But the adjustments cant be made because you won’t allow air to come

How come I can’t see the light?

But you can see everything so clearly

How come I’m left in the fog?

But your days remain sunny and bright

This is sickening

Down to my stomach

All of this one sided love and I cannot breath an ounce

So I guess what I am saying

Goodbye

Your love is not the love for me

I refuse to be accountable for something that doesn’t part 50/50

......The End.....

 

Nobodies Perfect

Nobody’s perfect
So why am I being viewed as someone who is perfect
Maybe it’s just at certain situations and decisions
Does it counteract the way that I am?
The reason why I breathe everyday
Or does it matter that my will is strong
And I won’t take no for answer
Does all of this matter?
So why am I considered perfect
So don't get me wrong the idea could be consider as great
The other hand kinda tells a more graphic and more horrific past
So why place such a title on such a imperfective person
I can never understand this concept
But it is given to me often
So I say I will always be me
I will constantly remain the way I am until the day I die
But the world views me as a prodigy
Someone who revolutionize the ways of today’s youth
And all I can say is who??
Do you mean me??
Do I see myself as this person oh higher learner
Perfected attitude
Someone that should admired or even adored
No
But I could imagine...lol
Today’s youth is filled with so many destroyed dreams
I guess when they see me they continue to say hope can be kept alive
In reality hope can never die
It is in the mind and power of the person where hope is needed
Or better yet on some level endured
So what is this really about?
Nobody’s perfect
Or should I say I am not perfect
So world love my perfect imperfection but i have
And I always will be

Conscious Talking

Does it matter that I think about him
Does it matter that the action a normal girlfriend would have can't come up
Does it matter for the first time I want to say you don't spend enough time with me
But all of these thing I can't do
I can say anything in  the time category cause time is money spent else where
I can open a door to my heart knowing the greedy part of me can't escape
My emotions sometimes dull down on numerous occasions
Slowly I wonder if the life I want is maturing faster because of the New Like of my Life
It's strange
Yet this Strange can be identified
It can come so much of a questionable thought yet the other side me is still not really touched
I guess in some sense this is good for me?
Not having the girlfriend side touch but the Wife in me
Having this particular feeling has some familirity to it
i wonder does this mean that this is where I am suppose to be
Everything is "Peachy Keen" yet I still have something shading my heart
Something that telling me that this is exactly what you want just not the right ___________
The Irony of the futuristic notions
So quick did this feeling come and go
Or maybe it didnt go
Maybe its here waiting by the phone
Looking for a message of return or
Or a jacked up phones call where all I get is huh's and ok's
This is really silly of me to think this way
A way that ruined many relationships
But this is not a relationship
This is just a man name Jones...Love Jones that is
He can come to tell my story and form my ending
He has come to say that the Brother of my Night
Can be the survivor of my Day
I could say I pray
But God has made many ways
I won't use if in the plan He made for me
I won't use can't in a process He knows I can succeed
But I am here
This is now
And I am waiting?
Maybe??
Maybe........................?